I can finally add another expertise to my resume! Dairy Farmer. Its like a 1 woman dairy farm over here. Nathan likes to make fun of me by calling me "daisy" but I sit for hours a day expressing milk and it sometimes seems completely pointless. Why go to so much effort when my baby cant have it yet, only a few ml per day and I have 2 overflowing freezers full. well I know she should be able to have it someday and I want her to have the most nutrition she can get so I keep going.
My days are filled with expressing milk, freezing milk (the millions of litres I have already filled a 2 freezers) and visiting my Jessie. Some days I only get an hour or so with her as I have to keep the other kids entertained, but yesterday for the very first time I got to try breast feeding. FINALLY I got to do what is one of the earliest and closest bonds a mother and child can have. Jessie took to it like a duck to water... a very hungry little duck !! She got a little distracted at times but it was such a wonderful feeling knowing that I was caring in the best way I can for my daughter.
We have also decided to participate in a fundraising walk through the Mater mothers hospital. We are walking to raise money for the amazing organisation that has cared for Jessie but also to raise awareness for gastroschisis. I can only hope that we will actually have Jessie home so she can come on the walk with us.
I have had allot of friends having their babies in the last 3 weeks or so as well, and while I am so happy for them i cant help but feel a little jealous because they get to take their bubs home with them and almost 2 months since my little blessing was born, I STILL don't get to bring her home. It is getting close I know but the time is dragging on. She is still loosing weight instead of putting it on, and having most of her feeds through her Nasal Gastric Tube. It is all a little bit frustrating. I have however learnt an inner strength and patience I never knew I had in me.
Fingers crossed the next time I post a blog it will be about bringing our darling little Jessie home.